I’ll start off by saying that I think it’s really important to know what kind of parent you want to be. It’s also equally important to have that discussion with your partner.
That being said, try to understand that those ideas may change a little once you’re actually a parent. They also may not change at all.
It’s okay to have an opinion on how your friend parents their child. I believe this will help shape who you become as a parent. You just don’t always have to share it. And even once you are a parent, you don’t necessarily have to share your opinion on how a friend interacts with their child.
I find myself stopping a lot more now from sharing my advice. What works for one may not work for the other. I have to continuously acknowledge that.
I do enjoy commentary on shared experiences. The difference is, you’re not telling someone how to do it. You’re telling them, “Hey! You’re not alone” and this is what happened to me (insert xyz). This way, there is support and a collection of ideas that you could take something away from or you can choose to leave it.
I considered what I wanted out of being a parent (aside from the obvious) but also who I wanted to be and how I wanted to express that. I decided on the kind of human I wanted to take part of this world and thought about what actions or values would best cultivate that person.
I’ll say that, I have stuck fairly close to those initial ideals and I’ve fluctuated when my actions have been ineffective and where my expectations for that human were too high (at this stage).
Being a parent is a very large task that most people don’t take lightly. Consider that when you’re forming opinions and ideas.
Don’t let yours be the “end all be all” of knowledge.
(Also nobody has given me advice recently. I’ve just got my wheels turning as usual)